it's seared into my memory as if i knew every single person there that day (i didn't). i remember working out at work with meg at the gym, watching the kids running from their school with their arms up and their shirts off. we didn't have the volume up, so we didn't know what the hell they were doing. me, being the utter and complete smart ass i am all the time, made fun of the boys with no shirts on. i think i remember saying things to meg like "let's all take our shirts off while we run towards the tv cameras. we'll be so sexy."
we both laughed of course. because we had no idea what the fuck was really going on. we had no clue that the boys without their shirts had taken them off to try and stop the bleeding from their teacher... who lay in a classroom with them, dying.
i became obsessed with columbine. i wanted to read everything.. hear everything.. know about every victim.. how they died.. where in the school they died.. sick shit, right?
but i couldn't get enough.
i was absolutely horrified at what had happened. and in all honesty, i think that tragedy is helped solidify my absolute hatred (and probably fear) of guns and what people can do to other people with them.
so today- 4/20/2011- 12 years later. i still think about that day. how i felt. how i still feel. and everyones whose live changed in those moments.