Monday, March 22, 2010

whale watching with no whales

alright, there might have been a whale. maybe 2 even. but all they did was blow water out of their blowhole thing and disappear back down into the ocean. WHERE WERE THE TRICKS?! the tail dive? the body slam?

that field trip was a total sham.

the false advertising that was this so called whale watching field trip started with a ridiculous mile or so hike to a cliff. a cliff that was blocked off by this here wooden border fence thing.
cliff border
whenever i would lean on that stupid fence, i imagined it breaking and my poor child watching me plummet to my death down some ridiculous cliff and into the elephant seals breeding grounds. then my horrified child would be forced to watch the seals play with my dead body like a rag doll. and he'd forever be scarred by the field trip that wasn't really about whales at all. but more about hiking and watching your mom die. where do i sign up?

we did get to see some elephant seals. but they weren't breeding. or probably even breathing.
elephant seals-not dead
they were just lying there. like that. the whole time we were there. talk about being lazy. sheesh.
we tried to hit that rock island with rocks. and by "we" i mean all the disrespectful little kids on the field trip who don't care about nature at all. okay fine, i tried to hit it too.
we tried to hit that
it's a lot farther away then it looks. and i probably broke my arm trying to be awesome and hit the damn thing.

oh look, a flower.
flower sooc

on the way back from the hike from hell... and on our way to the stairs from hell.. we ran into a fat gopher.
fat gopher
i wanted to name him and i kept calling him "allllllviiiiiiin" until i remembered that those stupid talking rodents were chipmunks, not gophers. but there was a part of me that half expected him to start talking or singing. clearly movies have not been a good influence on me.

ALRIGHT! we are now at the part of the story where the whales would come in. you know, flopping around, splashing, jumping through hoops and playing with beach balls.

instead, i got this.
whale 1
right after the whale blew water from his hole. exciting right? riveting! are you on the edge of your seat?!

i knew it.

after that life altering moment, we headed down to the lighthouse.lighthouse2
did i mention that you had to walk down THREE HUNDRED AND EIGHT steps to get down to the house? (and for those of you not so bright readers of mine...that means we had to walk THREE HUNDRED AND EIGHT steps back up ... a cliff... )
stairs that suck
by this point, i was really questioning my taste in field trips. i honestly thought that we'd be on a boat whale watching. clearly, i'm an idiot.

but this guy? he loves me just the way i am. idiot or not.
clearly i am smashing his head into my body
he even loves me when i smash his face into my shoulder for a picture.

after we got to the top of the stairs and didn't die (or see any more whales), i spotted a seal playing around in the rocks while the tide was coming in. lucky for me, he stopped to pose for a picture. i bet he's wondering how good i'd taste if i fell to my death and into the water for him.

then while we were walking back to the car, i almost ran into a deer. it literally ran AT me. i think it wanted to come home with me. it was probably thinking how good i'd taste for dinner. these animals are vicious!

and that's the end of my amazing whale watching field trip that really didn't have any whales, but all sorts of other animals. did i mention that i didn't realize how much hiking and stair climbing would be involved in this?! did i also mention that i wore BOOTS?

please imagine for one moment the pain my feet were in by the time we got home.

thank you for your sympathy.

this is my favorite picture of the day. the colors were incredible and i was constantly amazed that the water was that color in northern california. anyway, this pic rocks.
lighthouse at pt reyes


corrin said...

Lovely photos. And you deserve a pedicure and a foot massage after walking in boots all day.

jerseygirl89 said...

I'm pretty sure "whale watching" is a scam. Maybe I can try it in the stream behind my house to make some extra cash? I can't believe you did that in boots. My feet hurt just thinking about it. I second the massage and pedicure, with some alcohol and chocolate thrown in.

Grand Pooba said...

You seriously got some great photos! I'd be proud. Now I'm exhausted after seeing all those stairs.

My sympathies indeed.

Alison said...

Was it also cold and blowing a freaking gale out there like it always is?

Your pictures and commentary are fabulous. :)

Ericka said...

hmm. this weekend, i sat in a restaurant, enjoying a tasty beverage, and the dolphins came to play right at the end of the dock. perhaps you're on the wrong coast???

sugaredharpy said...

Go whale watching in Washington, from San Juan Island. AWESOME. I have a video of us getting freaking splashed by porpoises if you ever want to see it or I stop being lazy and post it to my blog. That I forget about.

But yes, the trip, even going on the worst month of the year and seeing no orcas (nor were they promised) but seeing LOADS of cool yeah, go.

Anonymous said...

Holy shit! Those are seals down there? They are HUGE! I thought they were rocks....boulders! Then I realized that is probably look like trying to get a tan and now I'm sad. Then I realized that I could charge for whale watching tours, but they probably don't have whales in a lake in Georgia and now I'm sadder...


judy in ky said...

You need to go to Maui. There we saw lots of whales doing tail dives and body slams! I think they love the warm water there.

Heather@WHMB said...

Haha, you crack me up. Your pics were great.

Issas Crazy World said...

I love you, but I am completely laughing at you right now. Ster? The wild whales are not the ones from Sea World. They do not do jumps on command.

jennster said...

i know they aren't sea world whales!!!!!!!! but still, they DO jump! and splash around! and do tail things.... the guide lady even told me so! :)

Anne said...

I second the Maui trip. I went in March, and the whales were nonstop action. Slamming into the water repeatedly, totally Sea World style. I love your last picture too!

veryanniemary said...

Love the photos...the last one with the blue water and red weatherbeaten shed makes me want to be there, but the photo of the deer? It looks stuffed...are you sure you didn't have a fiendish taxidermist on the trip with you?