Tuesday, February 02, 2010

let's talk about gifts!

i want to talk about gifts. not only because i scored super high on receiving gifts in the 5 love languages quiz i took, but because i'm wondering if i'm the only person who does this. who puts weird restrictions on what is or isn't an appropriate gift depending on the occasion.

oh my gosh. i am a total freak huh?

okay, so what are the standard gift giving days? valentines day... anniversary.. birthday.. and christmas, right? so, i've discussed how stupid i think valentines day is many times in the past. i've also discussed that while i think it's freaking stupid, i still want it acknowledged. BUT, i've also talked about the fact that i don't want anything expensive or extravagant on valentine's day. i just want something. flowers. candy. a card. dinner. something. SOMETHING!!!! i think it took boyfriend 5 years and me completely losing my shit before he got the message. valentine's day equals something small and inexpensive... but still, something.

then our anniversary. boyfriend wanted to buy me a laptop and i went into some freaking tirade about how i don't want a piece of electronic equipment for our anniversary. that our anniversary is about us... and our relationship... and to celebrate the day we got married and gave our friends the best.wedding.party.ever. and that i wanted our anniversary to be sweet and romantic. if he was going to spend that kind of money, i would rather go away for the weekend. go to the hotel where we got married and at least stay 1 night, or something. i kind of wish we would do that every year. but just basically i set these parameters that our anniversary was about romance. travel. getting away. hotels. or diamonds! ha.. but not a freaking computer. because how is that romantic? it's not, but it's logical. and thus boyfriend = logic and jennster = not.

think that all those other gifts... a new computer. ipod's. cars. expensive shit... are perfectly acceptable birthday and christmas gifts.

but is that weird? or do you do that too and you never realized it before?!?!


CL said...

First is he your boyfriend or husband, because you say marriage but call him boyfriend?

I do have a limit on gifts for me because my husband will spend his last dime on me. I have $200 limit on gifts. Now he rarely sticks to it, but I don't really need anything. I can buy myself what I need and even what I want. I love things that come from the heart not so much Tiffany's.

My favorite gifts have always been the ones when he gets me something that I've said in passing, that shows he's really listening.

CL said...

P.S we both read the love languages about 10 years ago when we first met.

I am; acts of service and words of affirmation.

He is; physical touch and words of quality time.

Neither of us is gifts. But who doesn't love a gift now and then.

jennster said...

cl.. he is my husband! but i call him boyfriend cause that's his name. LOL.. he was boyfriend when we were dating and i just never stopped calling him that. plus, it's fun. :)

Andie said...

I am definitely much of the same.

valentines- small expression of love
birthday- all about ME and what *I* want
anniversary-about us. a trip, a nice romantic day out, something for us TOGETHER.
his birthday- all about HIM and what HE wants
christmas- practical LOL

that's how we roll because I put those rules in place and we agree on them. LOL

Andie said...

ha! and my word verification for my last post was "undish"


Laura said...

I agree with your Valentine's Day gift standards -- small (since it comes from our JOINT banking account), but acknowledged.

Piece of Work said...

I'm really meh about gifts, and could care less what if anything I get for anniversaries, etc. But I have a good friend like you who is really particular (at least that what it seems like to me, a non gifty person) about the gifts she gets and when she gets them. And she attaches all this meaning to the gift and what it is etc. Which puts a lot of pressure on the gift-giver, which, when I'm the gift-giver, annoys the crap out of me. I usually throw up my hands and just get her something simple without giving it much thought, since I figure no matter what it is, it's not going to be right.
My husband is a great gift giver--which is all well and good, but like I said, I don't really care about gifts, so it's wasted on me.

Grand Pooba said...

Ok I SO agree. Wanna know what the hubster gave me one year for valentine's day?

A telephone. For our house. Nothing oozes romance than those electronic devises the "I" need, because god knows I love talking on the telephone.

(I despise talking on the phone and he knows it, which is another huge reason such a gift is RIDICULOUS! It's basically like buying me a leaf blower or something.)

Totally agreed with you Jennster, certain gifts for certain occassions.

Why don't men get that?

Karen said...

I don't get that romantic stuff. So I'd be all about a new laptop over one night in a hotel. I am not frugal at all, but the logic of having a new shiny computer for years is just more practical than spending a lot of money for one night.

Heather@WHMB said...

I'm with you 100% - more on anniversary gifts than anything. Don't care about how much you spend, just need thoughtful!

Alison said...

I love gifts! My husband says I'm difficult to shop for but I'm thrilled with ANYTHING so I don't understand what he means. I think it's just his excuse because he's not creative enough to figure out what to get me...or he could just buy me a freakin' Reese's Peanut Butter Cup and I'd be on cloud nine. Gosh!

Katie said...

AMEN Sista! I totally agree! Don't buy me a fucking iPod for our day of LOVE. Buy me something cute and sweet that says you were thinking of me.

boys are idiots (even though logical) sometimes!

Becky said...

lol we are the total opposite. we do gift giving at all those things but it doesn't have to be sentimental. if i want something electronic i'll gladly take it for our anniversary. no issues with that. i even asked matt for a new point and shoot for my purse for valentine's day. LOL. but this is totally you jenn and if i know you're like this then point should REALLY know, right?

btw, your wedding truly was the BEST PARTY EVER :) xo

Kristin said...

I love that you call him your boyfriend. And I agree that laptops are totally unacceptable romantic gifts.

point45 said...

I AM NOT AN IDIOT KATIE! now im going to return the coach gift card that i got her......