Tuesday, August 11, 2009

the book that rages

i haven't talked about the book yet. the book that i was so excited to get! the book that i was so happy to be a part of.. to get to read before you could buy it. i haven't talked about it because well.. frankly, i sort of suck. i haven't read the whole thing. life, work, the kid, the husband, baseball and stuffing my face with cupcakes & frozen yogurt.... well, it all gets in the way of doing important things, like reading a friends fucking book.

so here's my letter to danny.... the pioneer... ha

danny,

even though you went to the wrong high school in our hometown, i still like you. i am so proud of you for writing this book and i feel honored to be someone you actually acknowledge in this big bad world of bloggers. by acknowledge, i mean i'm like on your link page, not that you would actually talk to me in real life or wouldn't go running the opposite way if you saw me on the street. one night at about 11pm, i started reading your book. i had to turn the lights down because the brightness was annoying blake and he was trying to sleep. so in shitty lighting, sitting at my computer desk, i became enraptured in your novel. everytime you talked about where you (we) grew up, i would read each word like i was eating it for a meal. i laughed and was seriously in awe at some of the things you said about it. the things that you did on friday nights with your family and friends.... things i never even knew existed or were happening in our small city. we had such different experiences growing up there. but so far, in all honesty, those are my favorite parts. reading how you saw things about a city i don't think you really like... a city i can't stop loving. and i know that topic isn't what the book is even remotely about, but i can't help it. i think when you come from the same place, and someone actually writes about it, AND GETS IT PUBLISHED, you can't help yourself. i get excited anytime i see more memories from home coming up in your book. i truly am loving seeing your childhood through your eyes. i suck at this huh?

okay, well before i knew it, lots of time had passed and i was about halfway through the book. i couldn't.stop.reading.it. but my eyes were starting to fail me and fight with my brain that wanted more, but i haven't mastered reading with my eyes closed yet. i forced myself to go to sleep and convinced myself that i'd finish reading it the next day. but the next day came... and then it went. and i know that part of the problem is that the book is in my computer room- a room i don't even enter into on most days. and the other problem is that i know once i pick it back up, i won't be able to put it back down until it's finished. and i need to give myself the proper amount of time to be able to do that. and i need the time to be uninterrupted, you know? these are all kind of shitty excuses aren't they?

bottom line? i promise you that i will finish it soon. i'm sorry i didn't read it in a timely manner. i sort of feel like i failed you. like maybe you think that i don't support you, or i'm not proud of you, or something else that sucks. i just want you to know that i DO support you, believe in you and am so thrilled for you and wish you nothing but the utmost of success with this adventure portion of your life. i really am enjoying the book, albeit parts are truly painful to read. they hurt danny. they hurt to READ. i can't imagine what it felt like to LIVE. i can't wait to read more. and i promise i'll do it soon. i hope you forgive me.

xoxo
ster

3 comments:

Grand Pooba said...

Well dang, now I've gotta read it too! Just went and checked it out at Amazon and it definately sounds like my kind of book!

Love me some true raw memoirs about depression, a subject a little too near and dear to my heart!

DadGoneMad said...

Dude, what the hell are you talking about? You don't owe me anything and I still love you like a fat man loves cake.

TUWABVB said...

I cannot wait to get my hands on a copy of this book! Thanks for the shout-out/reminder!