Thursday, March 05, 2009

is this how we're raising our kids?

i'm somewhere between horrified and disgusted right now.

i got a seething text from boyfriend last night talking about a lady who was telling her kids that he was a "redneck, hick, dipshit." of course i never take anyone at their word, so i did what i always do... told him to tell me the whole story. asked what really happened. because i can't believe that someone would say something like that about someone they don't even know. but that's just because i believe for the most part that people are genuinely good hearted and not fucking judgemental assholes. *stop laughing, it's true. i tend to give people the benefit of the doubt FAR more than they ever deserve. if you really knew me, you'd know that about me.*

basically, the jist of the story is this. boyfriend has some stickers on his truck. and apparently one of the ladies kids asked her what one of the stickers meant. the mom (not knowing that boyfriend was IN his truck and could hear everything she was saying) told her son that people who had that sticker were losers. they were idiots who liked guns and liked to shoot things. that sticker made him a stupid ass hick... a redneck... and a dipshit.

listen, i hate guns and i'm not here to get into an anti/pro gun discussion. that is not what this post is about. and trust me when i tell you that that is a whole other can of fucking worms i am not ready to discuss.

my whole point is that is this what we're teaching our kids? is this how we're raising them? to call people who have different beliefs and opinions slandering names? do we really tell our kids that someone who likes guns is a loser and an idiot, without even knowing a single fucking thing about who they truly are as a person? we completely judge based upon a sticker they have on their truck now? that one sticker defines everything about that individual? granted, i think that if you put certain stickers on your car, people are going to judge you based on them. people are going to form an opinion about you. i know that i do when i see stickers on people's cars declaring their political or religious beliefs. i usually roll my eyes and think that type of shit belongs at home, not on a driving billboard. (that's why all my stickers are surf ones. you can form the opinion that i'm beachy, surfery, and belong in the water. in so cal. and that i'm awesome. and you'd totally be right. about all of those!)

moving on...

i'm just horrified that someone who would have that opinion, would pass it along to their child. i'm really not offended (or maybe surprised is a better word) that someone thinks that about boyfriend's sticker, or that they personally have that opinion and those thoughts. BUT can't you explain something you don't like or believe in in a non-offensive way to your child? does it have to be in a way that totally assassinates my husband's character and lumps him into 1 large group of dumbasses? i mean, that's where it's really sad. because we influence our kids. our beliefs become their beliefs. and that lady just basically gave her kid the okay to completely judge someone based on a sticker. and she also told him it was okay to call him names without knowing him. and i just don't get how that is right? how is that okay?

and what if her kid KNOWS my kid?!?? is that kid going to go up to blake and say "my mom said your step dad is a stupid ass hick." blake would be like, "what the heck does that even mean?!??!"

the best part? we will most likely see this stupid bitch (yes i'm calling her names without knowing her) at the baseball field. and i can't fucking wait.

23 comments:

Dana said...

that is crap. some people are morons. what happened to teaching acceptance? obviously it has fallen to the wayside for that mom.

Anonymous said...

I think it's disgusting. She should be ashamed.

Smartass Milf said...

WTF is wrong with people? What happened to "To each his own"? She needs to practice that.

Twenty Four At Heart said...

Oh how I wish he'd opened the door, gotten out of his truck and said, "I can tell you about that sticker if you'd like." It would have been priceless to see the look on her face.

By the way .....

you think I'm ** cute ** !!

hee hee! You made my day! :)

Alison said...

Can't we all just get along? :)

zandor said...

That is really kind of awful.

Elizabeth said...

I am by no means a supporter of having guns, but someone having a gun-related sticker on their truck doesn't make me automatically hate them. Makes me wonder what else that lady is teaching her kids about people who have different beliefs than hers.

corrin said...

Wow - I think some pretty questionable things about people at times (which I'm ashamed to admit) but I'd never say it out loud, let alone teach it to my children.

If that woman will say that in public, you wonder what she's saying at home?

Apryl's Antics said...

It would have been awesome if he got out of the truck at that exact moment and said "Howdy, Ma'am! Ya'll have a nice day now, ya hear?"

Issas Crazy World said...

Dam. It sure seems like the morons are out in full force right now.

I am not teaching my kids to be like this and I know you aren't with Blake either...so that's a few kids who will be open thinkers at least. :)

Chris O said...

There are so many types of prejudices out there. It's easy to make assumptions. Many times I've caught myself making a quick judgment only to be surprised about how wrong I was. Keeping your thoughts to yourself and not spreading hate is so important on how you shape those little sponges we call children. I think the key is to follow the rule my mother taught me. If you can't say anything nice about someone, don't say anything at all. But my dad always said, don't say anything about someone unless it is funny. Of course Olympia Dukakis said in Steel Magnolias, if you can say anything nice about someone, come sit by me.

Gini said...

The problem lies with the fact that for some reason, some parents these days feel that they need to be "friends" with their kids. When kids have no respect for their parents and the position they are in - those parents are in all essence teaching them that it is not necessary to respect anyone else. Hence, talking shit about someone IN FRONT OF THEM, and INCLUDING THEM IN THE FRIGGIN CONVERSATION. Whatever.

Laura said...

Hi. I'm a fairly new reader and am confused. I thought you were married, but you seem to refer to him as 'boyfriend' sometimes. Help me understand.... :-).

Thanks!
Laura

jennster said...

laura- boyfriend and husband are the same person! i just call him boyfriend cause it's more fun. lol

Anonymous said...

And your name calling is different because...
a) she did it first?
b) she was wrong?
c) you are writing it on a blog

I'm saying that she is right, I'm just saying that that there isn't much difference in what you are doing...

just a thought - doesn't need to be published - just pondered by you

Anonymous said...

Opps - I'm NOT saying she is right...

point45 said...

the entire point does not have to do with what she thought or thinks or anything to do with what she thought of me or my truck. i dont care if people think im an assohole. they can sit and rotate for all i care.

its the fact that she was teaching her kids to be ignorant and judgmental and not allowing them to think for themselves.

im one of the most opinionated people in the world. and i cast judgments on people constantly. but ive never told a child those things. i give him two view points and let him figure out what he thinks is right without telling him what to think, i teach him how to think.

coreymom40 said...

So not cool. I try to keep my thoughts to myself. I'm not perfect therefore I try not to judge. I try to teach my son to be open minded and always try to show him both sides to everything. I would rather know that I have taught him that.

norcalgirl28 said...

I have to give my two cents...it is completely obvious that neither that woman nor her child know Point at all. He is, and I am not just saying this because it is your blog, one of the most caring people I have ever met. That woman also does not know that Point would be there completely for her son if he was on Blake's baseball team or some other association. I saw it with Drew when he was on Blake's team. He cheered Drew up when he was down, he put him back in his place when he thought Drew was not being respectful or otherwise a good team player and he cared about all the kids on the team. God I wish I had been there. She needs a good smack upside the head!!!!!

jennster said...

anon- did you not read my post AT ALL? i fully acknoweldged that i was calling HER a name without knowing her (therefor being completely hypocritical in a sense).

however, i was not inviting my child to do so. i was not encouraging him to call her a bitch because she is judgemental and closed minded. and if you can't see the difference, i'm not sure what else to tell you.

jennster said...

norcal.. thank you. that was very sweet. we miss you. xoxo

Karen Sugarpants said...

Ya but you forgot to tell your readers what the sticker said.

"I shot Bambi and Bambi's mother."

:P

Dude - I don't know. When we lived beside those awful people at the apartment, one of my kids went to pound on the wall because the douchebag neighbours were playing their music so loud, and I stopped him, saying "we're not like that."
At which point, Thomas (age 4) piped up, "Yeah, we aren't douchebags!"
I think they pick it up anyway, no?
I wish Boyfriend had gotten out and said what Twenty Four At Heart said. That would have been awesome.

Krystle said...

Totally agree with you... you don't say anything like that to your children - geez.

My hubby has all the stickers on his back window too and has far too many guns and hunting things to count... and I absolutely fucking hate when/if he leaves his guns out around the house (unloaded of course), I immediately put them where they belong (OUT OF MY SIGHT!!!).

I agree with what Elizabeth said too - just because there is something on somebody's vehicle about guns doesn't automatically mean their a bad person... what else is that bitch teaching her kids? Yikes.