Friday, January 23, 2009

weight loss update?

so i haven't talked about my fat ass lately. it's time.

the 2 weeks of hell are officially OVER (and have been for almost a week now) and i think it's fair to say i lost somewhere between 8 and 10 pounds. i can't say for sure because i did not weigh myself before this all started. i have a weight that i WAS (before the holidays) and i had lost 5 pounds from that number. i'm positive it's more because i ate everything in site and didn't limit the candy. movie theatre size gobstoppers and bottle caps anyone? yeah, that was me. so i know i was over the number i thought i was at. but by how much? i dunno, so i'm guestimating.

i will tell you that the hardest part about those 2 weeks was my own mentality about it. i am so fucking rebelious by nature that i will seriously fight my own self. knowing that i CAN'T have something, made me want it that much more. just to be like "you don't control me" to my own self. very counter productive, i know. but now that i'm past those 2 weeks and i can eat more, it's awesome. since i know that i CAN have something, i genuinely don't want it. i really wanted some fresh bread with butter and so i literally took the smallest slice of it, and didn't even eat half. and that was fine for me. settled the want and the cravings and i don't think it made me gain all my weight back (or any of it realistically).

i guess the hardest part of all of this will be me. i do believe that i'm my own worst enemy. i don't like being told what to do, or how to do it- apparently not even from myself. all i know is that right now, i feel good. i don't feel like i'm depriving myself. if i want something, i'm having it- just in very small amounts. and that's how i want to live. eating what i want... just not everyone's serving of it. you know?

i haven't started working out yet, but when i do- look out! hopefully the last 10-15 pounds will just drop off. that would be nice. i'm still a fat ass, but i feel better about it. and i'm still losing about 1/2 pound per day. for now anyway. i'm sure that will stop once i start consuming a normal person's amount of calories each day. i started keeping a food journal at livestrong and i've learned that i'm barely eating any calories. i'm not hungry and i feel like i eat plenty- but the calorie number? practically zilch. so it's all really interesting.

and that's about it.

fat ass out.

5 comments:

Ali said...

i NEED to know what you are eating!! because, hello? that's AMAZING!

Heinous said...

You're doing great! Rebellious must burn calories.

SoCalMel said...

Awesome Jenn! Sometimes you have to "shock" yourself to realize your mind is telling you HAVE TO HAVE THAT BREAD & BUTTER, not your hunger. But then it's like "oh wait, no I don't, you silly mind of mine!"
I just finished 10 days of the Master Cleanse and the whole time I was craving a grilled cheese, animal-sytle, xtra toasted bun from In-N-Out. When I was finally able to eat again, I had one but you know, that "craving" wasn't as crazy as before & I didn't even finish it.

It's all about portion control too. You can do this Girl!

Kristabella said...

That's awesome! Good for you! Moderation is the key! It is the main thing they preach at WW.

I'm the same way, if I crave something, usually just a little bite or a small portion of it and the craving is satisfied.

Keep it up!

randomphotog said...

JEN!
Luv, luv, luv the blog! You're too funny!
Hey - I'd really dig it if you'd check out my blog, and if you like it maybe we could exchange links?
It's http://www.randomphotoblog.com. Check it out and let me know what you think...