Thursday, August 14, 2008

why hanes underwear rocks out with its *blank* out

ha! i can't type the dirty word i want to use here in a product review!!!! it wouldn't be right. right? i mean, even though hanes DOES really market itself towards that word. what? it's totally true and you know it! :)

hanes boxers. hanes briefs. hanes socks. when i first signed up to review hanes, per usual, i was super excited! i mean, we're pretty much a hanes family. well, at least the guys are. they are all about hanes under their shorts and on their feet. what i didn't stop to think about was the fact that i would have to actually grill my 10 year old son with questions about how the product was feeling, moving, holding his junk, etc. this was going to be tough.

me: blake, put on these boxers and model them for me.
blake: what?? what do you mean?
me: dude. just do it. put em on and then walk around and let me see if they bunch out and stuff like other boxers do.
blake: *groans* fine.

blake proceeds to model his cute bubble butt around the room. no bunching at the fly. YAY! i hate when the boxers do that huge gap at the fly. i mean, i always think that one day, his junk is just gonna fall right through that hole! seriously! i cannot be the first person to think that (just probably the first mom to actually write about it when talking about her son). so. awesome. they don't fly. hence the "no gap fly" hanes talks about. sweet!

next up, the briefs. blake is going through a pure hatred stage for briefs. he absolutely refuses to wear them. BUT, when he plays baseball, we make him. he is the catcher, so he has to wear something that will actually hold a cup in place. boxers aren't cutting it (although boxer briefs might work).

me: okay. now you have to put on the briefs.
blake: what?! why? seriously mom.
me: omg, just do it! please! you know i have to write about this on my blog and i want to make sure they're comfortable and don't ride up and stuff.
blake: of course they're not comfortable. i hate these kind.
me: just put them on.
blake: *more groaning and complaining* fine. they're on. can i take them off now?
me: no! pretend you're playing catcher. seriously. dude, get in catching position and tell me if they're comfortable.
blake: they're comfortable.
me: are you lying?
blake: no! they really are comfortable.
me: good!!! now do they ride up?
blake: what the heck does that mean?
me: are they riding up your butt, so you have to pick them out?
blake: mom! no, they aren't!
me: awesome!!!

this really is awesome because we have to get blake to wear briefs for baseball, and up until now it's been a struggle everytime. i don't think it will be a problem from here on out! thanks hanes. seriously. no really. thank you. (his nuts thank you too).

we'll continue to be a hanes family for sure. there wasn't much doubt, but with hanes new comfort fit promise- which means that if they aren't comfortable YOU GET YOUR MONEY BACK, it's even more of a sure thing! (although they totally made that promise because they know you'll think their products are comfortable and you won't want your money back and so well, they still win)

the only problem i had with these products at all, was the fact that boyfriend whined and wanted to know why they only sent ones for blake. where were hanes stuff for him??? at the store silly. go buy some.

this review was brought to you in conjunction with the totally awesome hanes and the super rockstarish parent blogger network.

please post any questions in the comments section and i'll be sure to answer! thanks!


norcalgirl28 said...

you meant you have to get Blake to wear BRIEFS not BOXERS for baseball. ...and god poor Blake!! You put him through so much it's a good thing he knows you love him more than life itself. I am saving this post for his wife!!!

jennster said...

i did say that? didn't i? i wrote that he has to wear briefs for baseball, although boxer briefs might work?!?! stop confusing me!!!!

jennster said...

oh you're right! i saw it. i fixed it. i look smart now.

Sunshine said...

Dude. I can't believe you went there. And here I thought my review about the Duggar family attacking my house was maybe overstepping.


I love it!

Issas Crazy World said...

Oh my god, I totally hadn't thought about boy junk and baby boy boxers. Holy crap how can I be having a boy? I don't know what the hell I'm doing.

Cracking up at you making your son model his underwears. LMAO.

Andie said...

I buy hanes comfort soft low rise undies now... I used to always buy victoria's secret and all that jazz... and then I realized, who cares what my underwear looks like?

In fact- there is an ongoing debate in my household about what constitutes a granny panty. I think I'll blog about it.

I want some free hanes underwear! :)

I'm glad B likes them, though. Their comfort soft stuff does really rock.

Anonymous said...

I have a coupon for a free pack of Hanes here. Of course I had to buy a three pack of mediums, only to find that there was a S, a L, and an XL in the package to end up with the darn coupon. D'oh!
Your son was a real sport. :)

do you think you have it? said...

your sun cracks me up! I give him major credit for doing that for you :)

CAT said...

this is freakin hilarious. SERIOUSLY MOM! lol

Nancy Carusone said...

I totally laughed reading your post. Adam wears boxers and loves them. He hated briefs. He has a couple of boxer briefs. Hanes also seems to be our underwear of choice for the family.

slackermommy said...

You totally crack me up! I've got a kid too who has underwear issues.