the carpet is in. the carpet looks beautiful. i could not be happier with the color of it and the way it matches every bedroom. it literally is the color of sand. like sand at the beach. *swoon*
pictures soon, i promise.
no, i haven't picked a kitchen color yet. although i think i really have. it's a deep, dark blue called northern star and i do love it- but i'm not sure how it will look on all the walls. we want to have dark countertops... and i think if we have dark countertops and dark walls, then the flooring needs to be light- and the cupboards need to be light. i think we can make it work. i guess we'll see. i'm still going to mess around with the kitchen once i paint the room with the fireplace in it. that's the only big room i have left to paint! YAY! things are slowly coming together in the ster house... although husband tried to break my ankle last night when i stood between his 200 pound desk and a stair in the house- he tried to push the desk up the stair, but my ankle was there instead. he pushed harder, until i screamed. lol it hurt all night, but by this morning- i could walk totally fine. it only hurts now because my shoe is hitting it. fear me, for i am made of steel. *pounds chest*
things are still as crappy as ever in my sister's house. between my ex brother in law, and my nephew- it's no wonder my sister feels constantly disappointed and let down by men. there is so much i want to say to my nephew, but knowing how vindictive the ex bro in law is, he'd probably try to take that to court too. i sincerely think he gets joy out of hurting my sister. i would bet money that it makes him happy to fuck her over. when will he get over it? or get past it? or get beyond it? or SEE past himself? my guess is never. because he doesn't even see far enough beyond himself to remember that he has a daughter in all of this. and that everything he does, or doesn't do, affects her too. he just doesn't care. because if he did, he would stop being such a selfish bastard and act like a fucking MAN. but that's too much to ask i suppose. i hope he reads this blog. i hope it was him that read the one i wrote before. and for once, i wish something i said would SINK IN to his head.
if you are reading this- please see past yourself. please see past your own pain and bitterness. please realize that the things you do are affecting your daughter... affecting your children's mother. i realize you don't care about her, but you should care about whether or not your kids have a house to live in with their mother (or at least somewhere to live with her). you should care if your kids have their mother in their life. you should give a shit that she is struggling so hard financially (because that affects YOUR children) to simply get by everyday. you should care that SHE has to figure out a way to pay for your daughter's college, because you aren't helping. yet you just want more from her. constantly, you want more. and you want to take money away from her. and for some reason, you think she has plenty of it stashed away somewhere. what reality do you live in? i honestly ask because you are the one who makes over 100 grand a year and she makes nowhere near that. and now that she is trying to "better herself" like you and your lawyer have insisted she do, you're using that against her. claiming she isn't home when the kids are. what do you want from her? i seriously ask you because do you have an answer???? if so, PLEASE tell me what it is. what the hell do you want from her? and if the answer that comes to you is something like "i want her to suffer. i want her to pay. i want her to miserable..." i hope you stop and look at what kind of person you've become. because who wishes that on thier kids mother for years on end? someone like you, i suppose. please prove me wrong. i freaking beg you.