when boyfriend and i did an outdoor check on the house that is now ours, we ran across a stone that said "snowy" on it. well, boyfriend found it- read it outloud- and then i shit my pants. freaking pet cemetary is in my future backyard. how wonderful for us.
in all honesty though, i totally wrote it off to being a cat.. or a bunny. but mostly i assumed it was a cat. i guess because snowy sounds like a dumb cat name. boy were we wrong.
last night we were at the house for our very first night of ripping things off the walls and taking off the popcorn when one of our new neighbors stopped by. she talked to us about the old owner and then she mentioned the fact that an animal was buried in the backyard, just so we would know. we told her that we knew snowy was buried and i made the mistake of asking what snowy was.
"a dog. a really wonderful, big dog."
to which i promptly freaked out with "a DOG??? a BIG dog?? like how big? like golden retriever big????"
she said yes. like a large sized dog. A LARGE SIZED DOG. and then she said, "well i would hope it's all decomposed by now..." to which i immediately breathed a sigh of relief at the thought that snowy, the monstrous dog, has been buried for at least 5 years.
BZZZZZZZZ- wrong again. when i stupidly asked how long the dog has been dead, she said since right when the owner was moving. so july. THIS PAST JULY. the fucking dog has only been dead for 5 months!!!!! IN MY BACKYARD!
first of all, who the fuck buries a large dog in their backyard? that's just gross. i mean, cremate the dog and put the ashes somewhere, but don't bury the damn thing in your yard. especially if you're LEAVING THE HOUSE THE NEXT DAY TO NEVER COME BACK!!! what a fucking asshole. who does that shit?!?!?! oh yeah, the same fucker who put wallpaper all over every stupid wall downstairs. i think he freaking killed the dog and then buried it. so now i'm going to have a dog spirit that's mad roaming our backyard for all enternity.
honey, we're calling in the pet whisperer.