i realize that giving you over a month to RSVP, and giving you over a years notice about the actual wedding, was simply not enough time. i can't make the dreaded seating chart until i know who's coming. i can't make the final payment on the wedding of the year, until i have a final headcount. you do realize that every one of you who has not sent in your card is making me pull my hair out, don't you? yes, i said every one- which means there are far more than just 1 or 2 couples who haven't sent in their card.
i understand the difficulty of checking a box and putting something in the mail. especially when you don't have to futz around looking for a stamp to put on it. that must be the kicker. next time, i won't provide the stamp. no stamp = motivation? i bet that's it. i made it too easy for you. i blame the stamp. no matter how cute it is, it's totally the stamps fault.
ps- i'm just being a shithead. i fully realize that our wedding is not necessarily an easy decision for some people- it's far away, not cheap to attend, and we're not having kids there. but don't you know by now if you're coming or not??