Thursday, December 07, 2006

i just don't understand

**issa, little miss "i'm not drinking coffee anymore and if anyone in this universe blogs about coffee or starbucks, i will hunt them down and murder them in their sleep!!!" you might wanna skip this post. thanks**

how the one, single think i like at suckbuck's, can be so apparently damn difficult to make. everytime i order my chai tea latte, it's like a freaking crapshoot. i feel like i'm taking a risk with every order.

is it going to be good? too watered down? barely hot? no foam? too much chai flavoring? not enough chai flavoring?

i ask for the same thing everytime. venti chai tea latte, extra hot and extra foam. (omg, i've turned into one of those people who add shit to their shit. i can't believe i even say the word "venti" out loud. i'm such a sellout.) carrying on...

suckbucks- when i give you the honor of gracing your preppie establishment with my presence (not to mention hard earned money), please do me the honor of making my order correctly. it can't be that fucking hard. and when i ask for extra foam, that does not mean i don't want any. that means be generous with the stupid foamy stuff at the top of my cup. i like it when the tea has to work hard to get through the foam to come out of the cup. yes, i'm a freak.. but i'm a freak who gives you money to make me tea. please make it right. or i'll stop coming here. and actually, that might not be a bad idea. my wallet might thank me. i can't believe i pay y'all as much money as i do to make me this drink. maybe we should register for something that lets me make my own chai tea latte's at home! oooh, foam galore!!!

here is last night's radio show. just click the play button to listen to me and izzy talking to everyone about their significant others! "this one time.. at band camp..."


Anonymous said...

Starbucks - what a joke. Of course, the entire thing reminds me of a Denis Leary bit where he rants about what ever happened to coffee-flavored coffee.

Anyway, I digress.

I think I might have had to throw the computer out the window if one more person had claimed their "meeting" had anything to do with band last night. I never would have guessed band would be such a successful relationship source.

alison said...

Sorry about your Starbucks experience. The only thing I get there (and we're talking maybe 3 times a year...) is a decaffeinated caramel frappucino and they always get it right.

Good decision to move your blog radio show to a later time. You might lose some east coast listeners, but those of us on the west coast will be done with the whole dinner-bath-bedtime routine and might be able to call in. :)

Mieke said...

Ahhh, Starbucks! I must admit I love them. I mean for the last probably 5 years I have been there is a lot of money! So I have no fear asking them to re-make my drink if it isn't just right! Your paying good money for it. I have tried to buy my own espresso maker for home, but it is never the same! Maybe you should go to a different location to try? Don't give up on them! Starbucks rocks!
*you can't notice I have a slight addiction problem, can you?????

point45 said...

is that off the no cure for cancer albumn?

the same one he goes off on the pronunciation of croissants?

Anonymous said...

Yes, as a matter of fact it is. When he talks about going into the 7-11 to get a cup of coffee, and the kid behind the counter has a tongue ring and his pants hanging below his ass.

Then he gets in his truck, and he starts smelling maple syrup. It turns out to be his coffee.

Mommy off the Record said...

Seriously. When you're shelling out more than 3 bucks for a drink, it better be right.

I'm always afraid to send things back because I'm afraid they'll spit in my drink though.

Melissa said...

HAHAHAHAHAHA, I love you. You order extra foam? With a venti? Girl you are one step away from being me. LMFAO. :)

Oh but I made it two days and I couldn't do it. I'm already drinking coffee again. I am a meany bitchy whore when I am not drinking coffee.

Oh and mommy off the record, they make it in front of you at starbucks, so they can't spit in it.

Anonymous said...

I'm Sandra,
from Singapore,
and I'm 14 y.o

Hi, Girl and Boy
I've studied English sinse Summer .
It's so hard Language!
I want like to meet girls and practisice My English with them.


Random Musings Of My Life said...

you should complain and get free stuff!!

cmhl said...

Starbucks (fourbucks) stresses me out.... I don't know the "lingo" and it makes me nervous to order.

I'm currently liking the gingerbread latte though, with a triple shot of expresso. Yowza!

Kristin said...

I'm a grande decaf nonfat sugar free vanilla latte...

I have also been known to order a half decaf half caf au lait... with one Splenda added before the milk.

I should be ashamed.

Anonymous said...

I've never bought anything from Starbucks and I've no plans to. The entire thing just seems so alien to me (I don't drink coffee so coffee shops aren't obvious places for me anyway) all these funny names and high prices. I just like a nice cup of ordinary tea.

Elizabeth said...

Grande nonfat sugar free Mocha No Whip. Mmmmm. Today I had a Peppermint Mocha which was so good. But yeah, for four dollars you should get exactly what you want.

Anonymous said...

I'm a hardcore coffee addict and I hate Starbucks. My complaint? Typical one, they burn the damn beans!!!

Dunkin' Donuts coffee -- XL with extra cream and a little ice (so I can slam it sooner, I need my coffee NOW dammit!). I get the same thing EVERY time at every different Dunkin' Donuts. That is a beautiful thing.

Thank you for making me love DD even more with your report of Starbucks suckage. It is good to appreciate a good thing.

MelissaMM said...

Well, for starters, your main problem is your buying your chai latte from Starbucks. For the best chai everytime, it's all about Coffee Bean.

Wait, they have those up there, right?!?!

Anonymous said...

Oh gosh, I love Chai Tea so much I named my Chihuahua Chai! ♥

Angry Dad said...

Please tell me that there are more variants of coffee houses than just Starbucks. It is getting blown out of the water Down Under by many other's hear (Coffee is such a huge market!)

Dudette, you also have to find a simpler order. Sounds like something from LA Stories...

P.S. Love the Blog Radio show. You and Izzy rocked!