Saturday, October 21, 2006

inspiration and grief

i recently went to a book signing and discussion with some people from work. now this isn't normally something i do, but the author is a friend of mine, and i really wanted to attend. she is such an inspiring woman. she has had quite the life and is honestly someone i feel like i could learn a lot from in many, many ways. there is just something about her that makes me smile everytime i see her. from the first moment i met her, i was greeted by the kindness in her eyes and the sincerity of her smile. in my opinion, she is one of the neatest people i've ever had the pleasure of knowing.

her talk tonight was emotional. she was discussing love, loss and the grieving process. she talked at great depth about her own personal journey in losing someone and how she overcame it, instead of letting it overcome her. it was powerful. it was heartbreaking. and it was inspiring. she shared stories of her experiences, as well as how her experiences affected other people. it was a very human story and it touched all of us in that room.

she has a quote in her book that is from another book (jack kornfield's "the art of forgiveness")- and the sick blogger that i am thought to myself as she read it... "oh my gosh, i have to share this because i think every single person has experienced grief at some level. experienced some sort of loss... maybe not in the death way, but loss of innocence.. loss of perception.. loss of something. and in losing anything you held dear, there is a grieving process. a letting go. so i bet everyone could relate to this. i have to share it!"

so here it is:
"grief is one of the heart's natural responses to loss. when we grieve we allow ourselves to feel the truth of our pain, the measure of betrayal or tragedy in our life. by our willingness to mourn, we slowly acknowledge, integrate, and accept the truth of our losses. sometimes the best way to let go is to grieve.
it takes courage to grieve, to honor the pain we carry. we can grieve in tears or in meditative silence, in prayer or in song. in touching the pain of recent and long-held griefs, we come face to face with our genuine human vulnerability, with helplessness and hopelessness. these are the storm clouds of the heart.
most traditional societies offer ritual and commnal support to help move through grief and loss. we need to respect our tears. without a wise way to grieve, we can only soldier on, armored and unfeeling, but our hearts cannot learn and grow from the sorrows of the past."

i found it to be beautifully touching. and i hope that in reading it, you too, get something beautiful from it. thank you jane- for all you shared and continue to share. her book is called Love & Loss and i invite you to visit her at her website. she's expecting you. *wink*

11 comments:

carrie said...

Thank you for sharing that - it is very true and people need to be reminded that grief is a very natural and necessary part of the healing process, and it sometimes can't be wrapped up nicely in a matter of days, or months. Sometimes it takes years. And to be supportive of each individual's grieving is the best thing we can do for them.

:)Carrie

ps. see, you can have fun at a book signing!!!

Tuesday Girl said...

I just found your blog and I now I know why I found it with this post, to help me.

Thank you that quote will stay with my always.

Erin Monahan said...

Very beautiful and touching. Thank you for sharing it. I haven't had a lot in the way of courage the last few days...

So, what's the name of your friend's book?

Stephanie A. said...

I am always reminding the people I work with that grieving is a natural part of life. I work with many people who are moving from their hometowns and maybe it wasn't really their choice to move, so they are grieving the loss of friends and family nearby, the loss of familiarity, the loss of their city. It really can throw people for a loop and their anger/resentment can manifest in so many ways. But it seems like once they acknowledge that they are grieving they are able to move on at some point instead of hanging on to that anger.

Your friend/coworker seems like someone worth knowing, for sure.

Dana said...

That quote is very meaningful! Thanks for sharing it...It has me thinking about my own experiences with grief.

Jodi said...

Deep. Jennster is DEEP. Beautiful and brainy, what a gal! :)

Becky said...

wow that WAS beautiful.

spidey said...

Beautiful and very true. :)

Christina_the_wench said...

It's hard to be a smartass when you get so serious. ;) Love what you typed. That was good.

Meg said...

I love it. It's so true. And I needed to read that. As I posted about a few weeks back, I'm still having some grief issues. But I think that quote really inspired me. Thank you!

Meg said...

I love it. It's so true. And I needed to read that. As I posted about a few weeks back, I'm still having some grief issues. But I think that quote really inspired me. Thank you!