Thursday, June 29, 2006

**bonus answer to the 20 things i hate**

becky just reminded me about something else i hate... not strongly dislike, but HATE, so here goes:

#21- cheaters. people who cheat. people who have no respect for other people's relationship and pursue those who are married, engaged, or otherwise NOT available. i hate cheating. i hate cheaters. i hate the whole dishonest, lying, bullshit, backstabbing, idea of it all. now i'm not saying i'm perfect and have never cheated on anyone when i was way younger, because i have. but i learned from it. and then i learned what it was like to be cheated on in return. and ever since, i've had an extremely strong aversion to the entire concept. i dislike everything about it. it tears you apart. it can ruin everything. it can break down every tiny bit of foundation you've built for years in an instant. so yeah. cheating. fucking hate it and everything that goes along with it.

ps- i also realize that there are reasons, choices, etc for why certain things happen and please don't think i'm judging each person in one lump sum. i have a gf who cheated and i know her reasons why she did so and i completely understand them and can see how it got to that point. i don't hate her, or her relationship, or anything like that- it just makes me sad. it breaks my heart for her because i just never want that for anyone. i like everyone to be happy. lol

**read the rest of my 20 things i strongly dislike list below**

26 comments:

Eileen said...

As someone who has (not proudly) fooled around with unsingle men in my day, let me just say that although of course it takes two to tango, in no way did I do any "pursuing," as if the thought of being with an attached man is attractive to me (consciously). The men definitely set the tone for the affair(s).

Becky said...

agreed. i cheated on a boyfriend once in HS and after i found out he cheated on me too it was the worst feeling ever. and that was just HS. now i'm married and i'd be devastated if matt did that. as any wife would be. and so i hate it too. its disgusting. pathetic. moronic. and i know the friend youre talking about and i agree...i dont judge her and she's been open and willing to share anything about the whole thing. we all know why she did it. but i STILL feel like it doesn't help anything and in MY relationship it'd destroy it. and even moreso, i hate other people who KNOW someone is in a relationshp and just dont care.

Melissa said...

I love that you added it. I have thought of a few more, but I'll save them for later. I hate cheating of any kind.

Dana said...

Thanks for visiting my blog! And for the toddler advice! :)

isabel said...

Cheating is very ugly.

Lisa Goldstein/Kelly Kelly said...

That's a good one to hate. Nothing but trouble and pain comes from it.

Lisa

The June Cleaver Diaries said...

I very strongly agree with you!!! I'm witnessing first hand what it does to a family by watching my parents!

Shawna said...

Even as that someone who has cheated, I don't condone or recommend it. It definitely didn't HELP our relationship, not directly anyway, although I think Admitting it to him helped him to realize what kind of a place he was putting me in, and set the foundation for us to work through things. It's a horrible thing to go through, you have the guilt on one hand and the other you have someone making you feel better about yourself than you ever have, but it doesn't necessarily make you happy because if you have any conscience at all the guilt will eat away at you. I not only felt guilty because of him, and my kids,but even for the rest of my family, my parents, my siblings, my friends... I felt like I was letting everyone down and I lost a lot in the process, including a very dear friend, and the funny thing is, admitting it to her in the first place is when we got close. She seemed to 'get it' I guess it's true what they say... people come into our lives for a reason, and when we don't need them anymore, they slip away. Anyway, I have no problem admitting Im the one who was mentioned:) If anyone is going through or has gone through something like this, I've been on both sides, the one hating cheaters and the one who found myself doing it. Im always happy to lend an ear or offer advice, or just discuss what I did and where I was mentally to get there. (((Jenn))) for understanding even though it goes against everything you feel about cheaters in general.

Lisa said...

Yup. THe cheating thing really angers me too.

point45 said...

ive NEVER CHEATED

im perfect.

socialworker/frustrated mom said...

I agree and you have a good list going.

Stephanie said...

I hate cilantro, but that's just me.

norcalgirl28 said...

oh Stephanie I'm so with you on that one Cilantro is the one thing I can't eat to save my soul If there is a leaf of Cilantro in ANYTHING, I will taste it and send it back It is becoming a complete drag to not be able to eat guacamole, salsa or most anything at Mexican restaurants Glad I have company

Anonymous said...

so then, you're careful to keep your cleavage covered and your derrier (sp?) draped? no? then you aren't as grieved by the deed as you profess,considering you are o.k. waving it in my husband's face.

MrsFortune said...

I thought you were going to say you hate that TV show, Cheaters. Which if you've ever seen it is soooo super weird, but what's even weirder is that it's my mother's favorite show. Bizarre.

jennster said...

anonymous- you obviously don't know me at all, cause then you'd realize i have NO cleavage to show and my ass is always covered and i want NO ONE'S husband except the one that is fixin' to be my own. if you're insecure, that's your issue. and don't even come here and tell me what i am grieved about, or am not grieved about. i think cheating is wrong. i think it's bullshit. i think it sucks. and i have respect for other people's relationships, even when THEY MAY NOT. so eat shit.

mamatulip said...

Okay. I read them all and can relate to every one, amen sista!, except number 16. What's pony ball?

Mommy off the Record said...

Yes, I agree. Cheating is unforgivable. Woe is the day that my husband tries to cheat. Does Loraina Bobbit ring any bells to ya? Yeah, I like to remind him what a pissed off woman can do.

heidi said...

Cheaters Suck...totally! Hate them, hated myself the one time I did it. Just bad, and Uh Yes, I am a judgemental bitch. So?

Kristin said...

Hey Anonymous - blow it out your arse!

Jennster, I am taking tips from you in the Troll dealing department.

Mom101 said...

Me and anonymous are starting a BRING THE BURKHA TO AMERICA campaign.

Who's with us?

mollymcmommy said...

ok need to direct a comment to anon too, get over yourself and get some therapy for YOUR issues.

amen.

m

tAnYeTTa said...

Jenn, I loved this post!

p.s.Remember, people who post anonymously aren't important and shouldn't be recognized at all.

CAT said...

you can shake your ass in front of my Chris.........I wont think you want to fuck him. people that get jealous so easily aren't secure with what they've got going---so instead of looking at their own situation and why THEIR partner makes them feel that way--they'd rather lash out at someone who is innocently shaking asses.
SHAKE IT STER!!

Holly said...

I often read comments on different blogs from "anonymous" and think WTF??? Cowards.

And yes. Cheaters suck ass. Totally agree with you there.

Survivin said...

I absolute hate cheating too. I was cheated on for many years and the so called "love of my life" accused me of doing it the whole time. What's the saying I heard "the guilty dog barks first". I hate guys that think I'd be ok with them being married or girls who will flirt or try to get with a married or attached man. It just down right infuriates me.