Thursday, April 27, 2006

freak out session, volume 1

there are things i randomly like to freak out about. why? well because i'm me. i haven't had an inkling of a desire to do anything for the wedding. granted, it's over a year away and i've already done plenty, but still. the thought of doing anything for it just doesn't appeal to me. the thought of completely wiping out the savings account to have said wedding, doesn't appeal to me either. i freak out about the money we're going to pay for this day.

and then i completely freak about the kid we don't have yet. will i like it? it can't possibly be half as cool as blake is. will i like blake better? omg, do people do that? do you have favorites? and if you do have a favorite, are you a bad mom? or do you just not ever admit it? cause i'll admit it. i'll point and laugh at the other kid and remind it how it is NOT mommy's favorite.
the thought of having 2 kids completely stresses me out. 2 kids in day care is enough to make me want to cry. how do people afford it? and all of you stay at home mom's, how the hell do you afford to stay home?! it amazes me how many mom's have the "luxury" of staying at home these days. i don't know how anyone lives without 2 salaries. but then again, i do live in california.

i stayed home with blake after he was born for 7 weeks. 7 weeks, people! and i look at that now and think how fucking crazy that is. and mostly, how i don't want it for the next one. i want to stay home for a few months. i want that option. and not end up on the streets cause we can't pay rent. so i stress about how i can make it work. how can i accrue as much of my vacation time as possible and use that for when i birth in the future? and then how else can i at least get some money while i stay at home for longer than 7 stupid weeks? it stresses me out because i feel like if i don't come up with a plan NOW, i still have to come up with one later. and by not at least thinking about it now, i'm just putting it off. and i'm not a good procrastinator. *deep breath*

oh yeah, one more thing while we're discussing the baby that does not even exist yet. i haven't been a mom to a baby in YEARS. i forget what it's like. diapers, breastfeeding, formula, potty training, when to give them real food and don't mix the fruits with the vegetables and put them on their back, no their tummy, no their back, no their tummy. i am completely freaking out, but don't worry... i'll be fine in like 10 minutes or so. ha!

28 comments:

penguininthesun said...

I'll plan your wedding! On second thought, that would probably make you even more stressed, haha.

I don't know if parents have favorites. If mine did... it would probably be me... or my brother jk :)

russ said...

Have you even thought and/or freaked out about the age difference in siblings and how that affects families?

jennster said...

both boyfriend and i come from families that have large age differences between the siblings (8 & 10 years).. so i've thought about it. and thought nothing of it. lol

Melissa said...

Girl, shit you are going to make yourself crazy. BREATH. Don't worry about a kid yet, not till your pregnant. And as a mom with two in daycare, you just make it work.

Somehow Blake made it to what, 8? WHich pretty much means you'd be able to do it again just fine.

BREATH dam it. ;)

Mel said...

LMAO!!!
You'll be fine. You're smart and have a good head on your shoulders.
Also, kid-having is like riding a bike. It makes your pelvis scream and your legs hurt afterwards.
No, wait. I meant that you never forget how.
Um.
Seriously though, my older girl has been a godsend. A god!send! to me in helping out with her younger sister.
The older the sib, the easier for the mom.

Piece of Work said...

What Melissa said. And so far I don't have a favorite kid, although I'm open to the possiblity. There are definitely TIMES when I have a favorite--like when VIvian was a baby and Isaac was a maniacal 17 month old-- I much preferred hanging out with the sleeping baby than him!

spidey said...

I freak out about my non-existant baby all of the time too. I think it is normal, or else we are both freaks! lol

Mike said...

I'm 7 and 10 years older than my siblings and I was told that I helped ,y parents out a lot. Jenn did the same thing, since she's 8 yeasr older than her brother. Blake will be helpful.

Also, you shouldn't point and laugh, that's not nice. Unless the kid is totally gross looking, then it's a free for all.

russ said...

my older brother is thinking of having another child
and their daughter is 8

Becky said...

lol youre crazy. i wonder how i'll be whenever i have a kid sometimes next year. with TWO kids. i dunno how i'll be. i feel like its been a long time since i've been a mom to baby too! it stresses me out mainly about money. AND staying home. i stayed home for 3 mos with hannah. i doubt i can stay home that long with the next one. i gotta save up sick time and i'll have only 3 weeks vacation so yeah, it sucks. i dunno what we'll do! JENN! youre getting me started! DO NOT get me started!

Beth said...

i am a sahm, and you would laugh if you saw how much money we make (or in our case, don't make). i don't even feel like i am making sacrifices either. however, i don't live in cali!

HomeImprovementNinja said...

My friend comes from a traditional italian family. His 5 brothers and sisters are all about 2 years apart. He is 9 Years younger than the rest.

If it's only 2 though, they won't think about the age difference.

Stephanie A. said...

I'd say not wanting to plan a wedding sounds about right. They are expensive and while they are awesome, wedding vendors need to freaking let up a little.

As for another kid- I'm right there with you. Adam and I talk all the time about how could we have another angel with a halo perfectly intact? There's no way it would happen twice. And then we just eat something.

Kristin said...

AHHHH! I was just crabby... now I'm stressed! you know all this shit actually works itself out...

Jimboliah said...

haha you're 2 cute ^^ A. ill plan everything for the wedding.. including the music :P (scary part is it'd probally turn out pretty decent) B. ill just come live w/ you and u can have my paycheck.. ill help pay for the bills.... chris and i can break the trucks.. no biggie there. C. it will be a girl and that will totally rock.. so there's no way u can play the favoritism.... example = I love 2 4wheel just as much as i love women... no favoritism there... just facts ^^ anyhoo everything will work out fine baby ^^ i promise :P Chatty soon ya nut

Domestic Chicky said...

I worried the whole pg with #2- "what am I thinking, what have I done, what have I done to #1??????" But it all turned out good in the end. It takes time, just like getting used to the first one is. Just different...LOL

PS-Where are you gonna get married? up there? down here?

mothergoosemouse said...

I'll tell you that for the first several months, I felt as if I alternated between liking one child better than the other. It's a stressful time. But now I can feel major mushy gushy love for both of them all at once.

And my assvice regarding the wedding is to throttle back. Think about what you guys would really like to do, what's really important to you, and then do it. You aren't beholden to anyone, so you can call all the shots (within the limits of your budget, of course). It will be fun. And it will be just the beginning.

Alison said...

You will love each of your children differently but you won't have a favorite. :) And, you don't have to worry about having two in daycare unless you're planning on have more than 2 kids total. Are ya? And, don't worry about how you're going to make it work, because you'll manage to do it. I stayed home for 5 months with Nicholas and for a year with Jessica. With Jessica, we had to refinance our house, and even though it sucks, it's an option. Another option is to start up that baseball league and make money from that! :) You can cart a baby around to practices and games. Heehee. You will be fine, Jenn! And like Melissa said, Blake made it to 8 and he's doing just fine, so of course you will be able to do it again. :)

Anonymous said...

As far as a wedding....I'm thinking Vegas would be much cheaper and a whole hell of alot funner....as far as a second kid....I don't have children but my sister's do.....I ask one of them awhile back how do you do it all..she replied.......you just do it.

Anonymous said...

P.S And not to mention, what I have read of your blogs.....you're a wonderful mother.....so I know if you had 10 kids....they would be blessed to have you!!

Jodi said...

Everybody is right. I am again pointing to all the comments above mine. EVERYTHING always manages to work itself out somehow.

WHen I got pregnant with my 2nd child it was the WORST timing ever. My husband was really sick with some kind of undiagnosable sickness and wasn't working. We had a 2 year old and were POOR. I'm talking food stamp poor. It was terrible. But, everything worked itself out. It always does. I look at Connor now and can't even imagine our life without him, he has enriched life 100 fold.

As for the wedding, I say less is more. A wedding is one day, but you have the rest of your life and many,many parties to host and attend. Your wedding isn't your last chance to have a huge broohaha, ya know?? So, RELAX and take a deep breath. And perhaps a cocktail or two. :)

Oh & thanks for coming to my blog and commenting. I LOVE that. Love it love it love it.

Lisa said...

Oh I just want to hug you because I can relate. I'm like that too.

And I'm freaking out about having another one too. What if I don't like him or her as much? Or what if I end up liking him or her more? And how in the hell do you get up with one child 6 times a night and still stay awake the whole next day so supervise/mother the other?

I live in Missouri, so its much cheaper to live here. Move here! Move to my subdivision. Lots of cute houses for $275,000-$375! Good school district. And FUN neighborhood. :-)

Lisa said...

I think you were on a Hot blogger of the month pole. So I voted for you. Twice...

Becky was a hot blogger too.

Yorksdevil said...

Mail fraud.

As for the kids issue, I've often wondered how the hell people manage to have kids that are all young at the same time. How are you supposed to look after a newborn with a 2 year old running riot?!

Angry Dad said...

Your freak out is what's wrong with our current society. You should have a choice! If you want to work, work, if you want to stay home, stay home. Unfortunately our society admonishes us for BOTH choices, making us feel guilty either way!
Ultimately, its up to you to choose. My wife hasn't worked at a job for almost 10 years as she's had to work at looking after the kids. We choose to do this, and you will make sacrifices either way.
Pretty much a can of worms topic. You should see what happens when this comes up on Mommy or Daddy Blog communities!!! LOL.

jen said...

hahaha, you are hilarious! I knew you'd be fine in 10 minutes or so.

Romancing Simplicity said...

Hey, depending on where you live in California - I used to work at a wedding coordination firm so if you need help, I can pass along plenty of contact information or "industry tips"

I don't think people really have favorites with their children. I'm sure you'll probably love them both and just love them differently. Don't worry too much about it. You're already a mother and you'll be brilliant at being a mother again.

They really should extend the maternity stay thing in the States though. In France, some companies allow you two years off and guarantee of your job back when you have a baby. How cool would that be in the States?

Virginia Belle said...

1. elope.
2. birth control.
3. vicodin.

Problems solved.

*VB rests hands behind head and puts feet on desk*

oh, and mel is right. at least, that's what my mom told me.