25 SIGNS YOU HAVE GROWN UP (thanks melissa for sending this to me)
- Your houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them.
- Having +sex in a twin bed is out of the question. (i'm sorry, but if i had too- i could dammit! i might bitch the whole time, but we'd get the job done!)
- You keep more food than beer in the fridge. (this is definitely questionable.. granted there is more food, but beer is a for sure close second)
- 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed. (so sad.. so true)
- You hear your favorite song in an elevator. (ewww! bullshit!)
- You watch the Weather Channel.
- Your friends marry and divorce instead of "hook up" and "break up."
- You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14. (only a loser who didn't have to work to pay to live ever had 130 days of vacation!! well, unless we're talking about when we were like 9 years old and stuff!)
- Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up." (but i look cute in jeans and a sweater)
- You're the one calling the police because those #@$%&*) kids next door won't turn down the stereo.
- Older relatives feel comfortable telling -sex- jokes around you. (please make this never be true)
- You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore. (HA! i don't think i ever knew what time taco bell closed. i thought it was open 24 hours for her ster-ness!)
- Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up. (yeah, well. it's a fair trade.)
- You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald's leftovers. (thanks for reminding me that i don't have a dog! *cries puppy wanting tears*)
- Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt. (you obviously don't have my couch!)
- You take naps. (naps are the idea of true goddesses. naps RULE!)
- Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one. (this one is so true it's pissing me off. i feel jipped!)
- Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would severely upset, rather than settle, your
stomach. (gross! who wants chicken wings at 3am??? pizza is the true after dancing meal!)
- You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests. (liar! i go for kids medicine)
- A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good stuff." (bullshit! a $4 bottle of wine was never good stuff.. it was just cheap stuff)
- You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.
- "I just can't drink the way I used to" replaces "I'm never going to drink that much again."
- 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work. (LOL! i have a message board, a website, and this blog.. you decide!)
- You drink at home to save money before going to a bar. (this is wrong, how??)
- When you find out your friend is pregnant you congratulate them instead of asking "Oh S-!- what the hell happened?"
- You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that doesn't apply to you and
can't find one to save your sorry old butt. (wrong again, old man)